I Don’t Care If You Wet The Bed

To All the Ships at Sea-

I don’t care if you’re a Democrat, Republican, an Independent, a Communist, or you wet the bed. Let’s be clear on something – inflation is 2.9%. It almost never gets smaller than that. The reason the cost of meat, eggs, milk, and gasoline is high is because of five major corporations controlling the world. It’s not inflation.

The Company Mondelez International, for instance controls so many different products They make a nutritious fig bar for people who want something sweet and not gain much weight. The package is approximately 35% larger than the two little fig cookies. Wonder why? They not only raised the price but in some cases by doubling or more, thats not enough, they made the product smaller. But you say it’s the same calories. Yes. They just added a little bit more sugar.

Many people from Germany, France, Greece, Canada, and the United States, or wherever, are being controlled and manipulated by major corporations. Now if you are fortunate enough to own stock in some of these corporations, you may be kicking ass and taking names. However, majority of these people don’t have a way of making money in the stock market.

One of the oldest corporations in the United States was Hershey. As a child in the West Village, which was a long time ago, once a week my grandfather would take me to a candy store the size of a medium closet in a high rise today. He would buy me a Hershey bar for 5 cents. That Hershey bar would last me until the following week, when he’d take me back for another Hershey bar. That candy bar was ginormous! Yes, I was a little thing at the time, but I’m equating not only the size, the quality, and the nickel back in the 40’s- which is not the same as a nickel in the 2020’s – I got it!

When I was dealing with a year’s worth of chemo, once a week I would buy myself a giant Hershey bar and that would last me, believe it or not, a whole week. The cost of that bar was approximately $2.75. Not so much, it was reasonable (dark chocolate by the way). Fast forward to today, that same Hershey bar (not the same) is now $4.20 a bit more than a single Hershey bar was 25 years ago. Really works great if you own Hershey stock, I know.

Basically what I’m saying is this – these corporations are putting us up against the wall and killing us. I am a capitalist–by the way, and I don’t wet the bed (you’ll have to figure the rest out about me from the above other choices). Before anybody blames somebody for inflation, you have to study it.

Prime rib 20 years ago was $7.99 a pound. It’s now upwards of $32 a pound. When you ask the rancher, the rancher will tell you they’re not making any money. When you ask the slaughterhouses, they’ll tell you the same. You ask the butcher, he tells you the same. I want to know who the hell is making the money?

I’ve been out to dinner with five wonderful friends that are all affluent, and except for one (you know who you are), the meal would be chicken, turkey, pork, pasta, soup. My one dear friend puts out a prime rib to die for. The majority of people are trying to make things go a bit further.

I sometimes wonder how the majority of people can actually get through the night on their two, in some cases 3, job salaries. You better believe they’re not buying stock in these huge, multi-national corporations.

One way or another, we’re all going to pay for it in the final analysis. Maybe I’ll just have to go on a diet…

Camera Companies (Leica, Nikon, Canon, Fuji, Sony)

The whole world defines the photographic product by companies. Everybody wants to know, how many megapixels a camera has, how many frames per second, are the cameras waterproof, are the lenses water resistant? how’s the auto-focus, do they have tracking? And the list goes on…. What camera should I buy? The simple answer is the one that fits your hand, your eye and your wallet. Today it’s impossible to buy a bad camera, they’re all good. Understand, that’s not why you would buy the camera.

(See Speaker TBA) – You let go of your # 1 Person at Canon. His name is Rudy Winston!

I’m going to tell you a little story, and its true, no bull-

I started my photography with a camera called a Robin. I then went onto a Nikon and Leica rangefinder. Then got serious about my photography and shot Nikon from 1959 through 1983. In 1983 I chose to take a contract with the IOC (International Olympic Committee). To be able to photograph the 1984 Olympics under the contract I had to give up Nikon for Canon and Kodak film for Fuji film.

When the olympics were over, one year after the final ceremony, I could then switch back to Nikon. Did I switch back? No. The reason I didn’t switch back was not the president, vice president, general manager or the U.S. CEO of Canon. It wasn’t because of shutter speed, aperture and quality. It was because of one person and his name is Rudy Winston.

Rudy Winston, in my opinion, is the greatest technical sales rep and all around maven that God put on this earth. Not only is he a great photographer, but from a technical standpoint there is nothing he does not know. He could take an idiot like me and teach me about a particular feature which would allow me to make much better photographs. When I tell you I know 5% of what Rudy knows about all aspects of cameras, lenses, accessories, etc. I mean it. The man is a genius, and with all of his talent he has one thing that is small, and that’s his ego. With all of his great talent, he has a small ego. If you needed help at midnight he’d be there to help you. If you had a major assignment and you needed to borrow a 2nd 600mm, he’d be there to lend it to you. He could teach you small, little things that would make your photography so much better, and there are other times where he could teach you HUGE things that would actually make the photograph. I genuinely believe what took Canon Cameras from 2nd or 3rd place and made them 1st place was Rudy Winston. Knowing the photographic companies the way I do, I also know that whatever Rudy was earning, it should have been magnified tenfold.

You would think that the higher-ups of Canon would promote Rudy to a senior Vice President. It would really make sense. So what did they do? They cleaned house because they didnt like the numbers and let go approximately 1,200 people throughout the world, and Rudy was one of them. What a travesty! Terrible, stupid, and unnecessary. Will it affect their future sales? Absolutely!

When I decided to move from Canon over to Sony, and before I did this, I called Rudy. I said, Rudy, we’ve been together since late 1983 to 2019, it’s time for me to make a change. He didn’t try to talk me out of it. He understood why I was doing it and that it would be better for my photography to move to Sony.

We maintain our friendship, still today. Do I still love him? Absolutely! At the moment, I can no longer reach him. What I’m about to say, which may or may not be true, he’s so devastated. He changed his phone number, emails, etc. All I want to tell him is how great he is.

If anyone reads this blog and is part of the photographic business, if you want a #1 man, find Rudy Winston and hire him. He’ll take you from wherever you are now to a much better place.

Rudy, I hope to hell you read this, cause I’d love to talk to you.

My go-to person at Sony is an old friend from Dynalite, Jason Etzel. Jason is cut from the same cloth that Rudy Winston is cut from. Yes, he knows 500 times more about Sony than I ever will, and when I have a problem he’s right there to bail me out.

At this point, I should say something. 20 years ago, I thought I knew EVERYTHING about photography. Fast forward to 20 years today, not so much. It’s almost like I’m starting over again and I’m 16 years old. It’s a brave new world.

Jason, I couldn’t finish this blog without mentioning you. I think I’ll start rereading George Orwell’s 1984 for the 6th time.

See below some photos from JoAnne’s and my on-going Autumn/ Winter Art Exhibit at Forest Hall Studios and Gallery on opening night. The name of the Show is Side By Side.

The address is 214 Broad Street, Milford, PA. Hours 11-5 on Saturdays, 11-3 on Sundays or by Appointment.

Lessons Learned

Lessons learned… All Photos © Joe DiMaggio

Almost 6 decades ago I worked on Park Avenue – not the same Joe DiMaggio people know in 2024!  I had a short haircut, a Brooks Brother’s suit with button down shirt, and silk tie with a double Windsor knot.   I wore sterling silver cufflinks and a matching vest.  The suit was a  light-weight grey and had black stripes.  Of course, I had wing-tipped shoes with matching socks (hard to envision both for you and me.)  My boss’s name was Bob Cohen.  His boss was the senior VP of Smith-Corona Marchant.  I was ridiculously young.  After 3 months of hire, my boss decided I was going to be a field supervisor with 12 men working with me NOT FOR ME.  I explained this wasn’t going to work because one of the men was a retired NYPD officer with 5 kids and three of his kids, were older than me.  Bob explained to me I could do the job.  Once a week he would take me to a Jewish delicatessen (not Katz’s) and he’d give me a 90 minute lesson on administration and how to treat people.  My dad who graduated NYU, 17 years earlier, was a stickler for honesty, positivity and treating my fellow man always as an equal.  I was never better than anybody else!  Both men, radically different people but they both had similar concepts on humanity and the society we lived in.   One of the ninety minute lessons was – never put a man, woman, or dog in a corner where they couldn’t go left, right, or couldn’t get out.  That was unacceptable!  What’s amazing is now 60 years later that’s imbedded into my brain. 

It seems like the world loves Joe D as long as I says Yes!  The minute I deviate from Yes, things become dark grey, swinging towards black. When I left NYC for Centerport and then relocated to the Upper Delaware (Milford, PA), one thing was obvious, I did not need new clients.  I had plenty from Manhattan to Tokyo, Rome etc.  Many of my friends and I had almost a 40 year relationship.  So, the last thing I needed were new friends.  I already had great friends that would die for me and I for them.  Pat Nap took on 4 men who were beating me possibly to death, when I was just 16, and saved my life.  Brandofino was Pat’s best friend and there was no way he’d let anyone lay hands on me.  They were both 2 years older than I.  So why would I need new friends?  

When it came to the arts I had Dennis Wheeler, a world class artist/art director and all around great human being.  Dennis was a great guy who’d even sometimes baby-sit my son for hours when I met with clients in NY, and taught him how to paint and sketch while doing so.  My son went on to being published in a national Magazine at age 9 (I didn’t get published until I was maybe 23.)  Then there was Paul Laddin another great artist who painted in oil.  A very disciplined artist and a true master.   He was also President of a large Ad agency in NYC on Park Ave. These are just a handful of close friends.  There are so many others. At this point I almost forgot my all time best friend, the great photographer and beautiful JoAnne Kalish.  Yes, she is a better photographer than I and I just have to live with that!  The advantages is that I she has a small ego and I don’t!  

We now come full circle to 3 years and 2 months ago, I decided to join AA.  Anybody who knows me knows the last thing I would do was join any organization and certainly not AA!  The simple reality is without AA my ashes would have been already spread in the Hudson River or the lighthouse at Eaton’s Neck.  My brothers and sisters at AA taught me it’s not about me it’s about us.  I should also add that my concept of not needing new friends was wrong.  I not only needed new friends but want new friends.  I love the new friends as much as I love the old friends, whether they are still on this planet or have moved on.   I love my life and friends and for whatever time I have left,  all I want and need is Health and Happiness for Us All.  These are the only things that are important.  I will always remember to never put someone in a corner and strongly recommend you not do that either.  My “word,”  there I go again… Our “word,” Is more important than anything else.  

This is Joe DiMaggio master of the run-on-sentences, signing off.  God Bless!  

I’m not an economist, but I’m also not an idiot.

Whether you’re a democrat, a republican, an independent, a communist, an atheist, whatever… please, whatever you do, don’t blame the government for inflation. Inflation has plummeted considerably from four years ago.

The problem is my snickers bar has gone up 33% in price and it has been reduced in size by approximately 20%.

My nabisco power bar has gone up in price approximately a 9 dollar box is now 14.99… and when you take out the power you have 20% of paper thats not full. They didn’t even change the packaging so that it looks like the bar is full. So the price has gone up and the product has gone down, so lets blame Joe Biden… Not.

You guys have to think that the majority of human beings on this planet are total assholes.

I needed some cayenne pepper to stop the chipmunks from eating my tomatoes. I went out to buy some more, please see photograph. They haven’t even just changed the packaging. It was 20 oz, then 16, now 14. The price was 5.99 and it went up to 10 and they give you a discount of 20%. You’ve got to be kidding me. I don’t want your damn discount. Just give the costumer the damn truth. Don’t blame a government in Italy, France, The United States.

The last time I looked, if you believe in God, God made water. And if you don’t believe in God, then water is just here. Why would I spend upwards of 5 to 15 dollars for a small bottle of Fiji water? I’ve been to Fiji, the waters free.

The reason theres no more upper-middle class or middle class is because we’re getting devastated by approximately nine major corporations that are dictating the prices we have to pay.

Gasoline should be approximately 70 to 90 cents a gallon. I believe the prices in California are upwards of 5 dollars a gallon. Yes, most of that is taxes. But the Exon Mobiles of the world are making hundreds of billions of dollars

Starbucks went up 26% yesterday because they just hired the CEO of Chipotle. But Starbucks, the largest coffee chain all over the world, was down 9%, and they wonder why. Eight dollar cup of coffee, its mostly water. Uh oh… maybe its Fiji water, thats why they charge so much damn money for it… not. By the way, their coffee sucks. At 25 cents it would be too much, it just tastes like burnt crap.

To all the ships at sea, you work very hard for your money. Wise up, stop giving it away to corporations that are sodomizing you.

Have a great day.

Joe D.

© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio

No Rhyme or Reason #2

© Joe DiMaggio

The first thing that I learned at the University of Missouri School of Journalism, Cliff Eaton explained a photograph. He simply said, “If you look at a photograph, and theres a caption that says, “Grandfather teaching Grandchild how to catch a bass in the lake at sunset”, you don’t have a photograph.” If it requires that type of a caption, it’ll never fly.

I assisted Gene Smith, and while he was alive, other people captioned his work, but he never captioned them.

I’ve come to a point in my career, after being a working pro for over a half a century, where what I’d like to do is make photographs just for myself (That doesn’t mean if a client came along and wanted to pay me to do something, I may consider it… I’m certainly not independently wealthy).

I want to have fun. If you have a camera, thats what you should do, you should have fun with it. It shouldn’t be a chore, nor a hassle, it should just be fun. Life is too short to be grinding your teeth, cracking your knuckles and being a hard ass.

I’m going to die a sweetie, not a hard ass… I hope.

I asked Ansel Adams why he would spend a week, or more, making one photograph. I could just never understand that.

People ask me why I’m photographing hummingbirds. They’re in my backyard, they’re absolutely gorgeous, they’re faster than a Saturn 5B rocket and they only stay for a fleeting second. Its not like the Indy 500 where they go around for 5 hours. You get one shot every hour until the sun goes down, or the top of your head is burnt to a crisp

To all the ships at sea, for gods sake, have some fun.

© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio

Michael Weinstein II

© Joe DiMaggio

I went back to have a 2 hour conversation with my dear friend, Mike Weinstein, and one of the things I thought about was the fact that he was a skinny, Jewish kid from the Bronx.

I miss you brother. I have a funny feeling I’m going to see you shortly… but that’s not up to me.

Pain (Excruciating Pain)

© Joe DiMaggio

Last week I worked one day with my new assistant, Chase. When he left, I wound up in bed for 4 full days.

When my partner, JoAnne, insisted I go to the doctor because I couldn’t walk, my neck, knees, leg, and back were shot. There wasn’t any part of me that wasn’t shot. Went to the doctor, and the prognosis was Lyme Disease.

My blood is out to the lab to see if I indeed have Lyme disease.

In my career, which stands over a half a century, I never photographed birds. I love birds, I love looking at them, I love seeing them fly, but as something that I’d like to put on digital film… it’s really not up there in my wheelhouse.

Considering I’m having a hard time holding a camera, and holding my head up, here are just a few images that were done specifically for me, and nobody else.

© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio

If W. Eugene Smith was alive, he would attempt to beat the living shit out of me for this type of an image.

Guys, it’s just fun, and Photography should be fun.

Grey Towers

© Joe DiMaggio

In 1886, James Pinchot finished construction on his mansion Grey Towers, in Milford, Pennsylvania. He is the man who invented the United States Forest Service. It’s one of the hidden gems of the upper Delaware Valley. If you’re within 50 miles, it’s really worth a visit. The grounds are magnificent, the flora and forna are magnificent, and the building is just gorgeous.

© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio
© Joe DiMaggio